How to know if you have a troubled teen

“What defines a troubled teen and when do I seek intervention?”

One of the obstacles that can cause parents to delay in getting help for their struggling teen is confusion about the answer to above question.

Many parents find themselves comparing their child to other children by saying things like “My child is not as bad as their kid!” and “Why can’t my teen act like that so-and-so’s child?”

Below are signs of a troubled teen:

* Your teen has regular, sudden outbursts of anger that are clearly unreasonable.

* Your teen regularly misses curfew, does not show up when expected, and lies about his or her whereabouts.

* Your teenager has suddenly changed his or her peer group and hasn’t made an effort to let you meet these new friends.

* Your teen has stolen money from you or others in the home on regular occasions.

* Your child becomes more secretive, and it seems like more than a desire for greater privacy.

* Your teen has extreme mood swings, from depression to elation.

* Your child’s grades have suddenly dropped and the child has lost interest in the usual activities.

If you notice that your teen is displaying more that 2 of the above signs be sure to talk to your teen about what you are noticing. Ask them what is going on and let them know that you are concerned. Also speak to them in a non-attacking way. Never be worried about calling their physician to discuss what you are noticing.

The most important step is the 1st step

Keep your teen out of gangs

Gang violence in schools has become so prevalent that schools often have special police officers assigned to deal with it. Being aware of gang involvement or gang intimidation is necessary to keep your teen safe and involved with kids who are positive influences. Teens looking for acceptance will often look for negative attention just as readily as they seek positive attention. Setting a strong example and being an active parent are two ways to help your teen steer clear of gangs.

Keep Your Teen out of Gangs

• Be a positive influence for your teen. Providing a strong parental role model is considered the best way to help your teen through difficult situations.
• Give as much attention as possible to your teen. Gang involvement sometimes starts because teens aren't getting the attention they need at home. Be your teen's biggest fan! If your teen feels supported, valued and respected in his house, he may be less likely to try and meet those emotional needs elsewhere.
• Help your teen focus on her goals for the future. Ask her to think about the bigger picture. This is especially important to focus on until teens can set strong future plans for themselves.

Teach Your Teen How to Respond to Gang Violence

• Treat the problem seriously. If your teen is fearful of someone at school, contact school authorities or the police to deal with the situation immediately. Keeping your teen out of danger is your first priority.
• Set an appointment to meet with the school principal or vice principal immediately. Sometimes school authorities are unaware of a volatile situation until it's too late.
• Tell your teen to avoid the kids in gangs. If your teen feels intimidated, let him know that it is okay to walk or run away from these gangs.
• Encourage your teen to create a positive relationship with a trusted adult at her school. Make sure she knows there is someone at school she can go to if she is being intimidated by gang members.

How to Discipline a Teen

All parents who are raising teenagers in today’s hectic world know that disciplining them can be tricky. You have to wager the punishment with the crime and make sure that you are constantly enforcing it. But many parents lack the skills to effectively discipline their teen. These steps will tell you how to punish your teen and assure that they know exactly why they are being disciplined.

Talk to your teen about what they did. You first must discuss with your teen what they did and why they are in trouble for doing it. Do not yell as this will only make them put up a brick wall. Rather, casually and calmly explain to them why they are in trouble.

Let them know why it was wrong and why you are going to punish them. Your teen is anxious for direction, this is why they rebel. Let them know that what they did was indeed wrong and that they are going to have to be punished for it whether they like it or not.

Decide on a punishment. Make sure the punishment fits the crime. Decide on the best form of punishment. Be it grounding or freezing of their privileges, make sure it is something that they will remember and will associate with their actions.

Stand firm and enforce the rules. Your teen will try to do anything and everything to get out of their punishment once it has been handed down to them. You must stand firm and make sure that they serve out the entire portion of their punishment so that the lesson can be learned.